\since we're such awkward bedfellows

got a case of love bipolar,

i'm in no mood to do work right now. I would, if I could be bothered. but the only thing I have set my mind to doing is econs essay outline, and I found the entire answer nicely printed out for me in my econs essay book. awesome prorsum.

as for maths... I have no clue. none, whatsoever. so help me God. -.-

this is only the second week of school, yet I feel as though it's been so gruelling I'm extremely exhausted, even though I know my schedule is nothing like some of my friends'. maybe it's because I stay back in school practically every day, to study and to wait for my brother. who normally ends quite late, at 6+

there's pe tmr... damn. I'm in no mood for anything physical. couldn't we just do something cute like playing ice and water? HAHA OR WHACKO. -.-

well.. it hasn't been easy playing dumb. keep seeing that face in front of me and it has the same effect every time. it's majorly frustrating. I know why I am so far gone, but it still irks me... I don't understand why it must be him. well I do, actually. but... I don't know! I've never taken so long just to get over somebody. it sucks bigtime. BIGGGGGGG TIME. just because, I don't like it. I like to think I'm in control of the situation when it comes to falling for people.

cos I know, and i think almost everyone close enough to me knows too, that I fall for people quite easily. so I have to move on fast every time I decide that's enough. (wow how superficial does that sound, shit)

yeah well... the thing is that I could have a billion different crushes, in quick succession. but I only ever fall deeply, like super horrible disgustingly wonderfully deeply, once in a blue moon.

OKAY. BACK TO SANITY TMR. back to treating you like you never were someone special to me. ohwell. at least the good news is that I think it's working pretty well. have to keep working at this...

and then it all goes back to the question, AM I ATTACHED?

actually no it doesn't, just that something happened which brought that question to light, and since I really wanna get this over and done with, and also because I couldn't think of a subtle way to say it, also because it's highly disturbing that people are questioning it,

I am not attached. I just have a really good guy friend, and I know that sounds like a convenient excuse, but seriously. seeeeeeeeriously... aiyo.

and then I also doubt, no, I'm extremely convicted of the fact that I'm not gonna BE attached any time soon.

I mean look at the guys in school. seriously. HAHAHA. nah I'm kidding. partially. :P opps.

but in all honesty. I don't see anything awesome about me. not anything that's so special, anyway. argh. ):

posted by aney @ 9:11 PM